So, on the advice (read: demand) of a good friend, I shall be writing on long distance relationships tonight. Of all things under the sky. I've never gone through one personally, so whatever I know about this subject is purely academic and quite possibly unrealistic, and I shall not be liable for any misinformation or broken relationships arising from that.
Honestly speaking, I am quite divided on the subject of long distance relationships. On one hand, it could be a romantic proof of a strong relationship, while on the other it could be just daft and impractical; "Oh my boyfriend lives in Timbuktu and I see him once a year, provided his cattle business does well that year", seriously, that relationship's never gonna work, is it? But globalisation, technology, higher education, spare time, and social networks have given rise to many long distance couples. I have friends who are in long distance relationships, and guess what, some of them haven't met each other in person. Of course, some of the relationships are necessitated by external factors, such as migration or going abroad to study and what not. Which suddenly popped this question in my head: Does a relationship between a NS recruit and his girlfriend count as a long distance relationship?
Anyway, I can probably argue more cons to LDR than pros. I'll probably start with the pros then. If a couple were to be able to maintain a LDR for years on end, and still remain faithful to each other, they should get married. ASAP. That's true love right there, I think it deserves a lot of respect because it really isn't easy. In a way I guess you could say that it's an indication of a couple's commitment and love for each other. That's all I can think of, off the top of my head.
Cons. Bloody hell, you kidding me, there's so much shit I can say. You need a HELL lot of trust to be able to start one. You can't see each other personally, you can't be sure of what the other party is doing, you can only take each other's word for it. That's practically mental torture for some. In my opinion, a relationship has two aspects: emotional and physical. A LDR totally removes the physical aspect of the relationship; a warm hug, a hand to hold in the crowd, a shoulder to cry on, (le sexy times), they're all non-existent. It's like this empty void that's inexplicably there. Which is why parties end up cheating on one another isn't it.
I asked a question earlier about whether NSmen are in fact in a LDR with their girlfriends. I think it can sort of be considered a LDR you know. For 5 days in a week you are on this offshore island, completely isolated from civilisation. You have 2 days where you are allowed to go back home so that you don't lose your sanity. In that 2 days, you have to create time for yourself, your girlfriend, your family, your bros, your good friends, your friends of lesser significance, and other people of lesser to no significance. Basically that's almost impossible, something's gotta give. So it is a LDR in a sense that the couple can only meet for a limited time every week, if they can even meet up at all. Which reminds me, if I do get a girlfriend between now to my enlistment, I'd probably have to go through this LDR shit...... but I shall worry about that only if the need ever arise.
I do know of so many friends facing problems as a result of LDRs. One is feeling confused as to whether she should continue or break up for now until he gets back; another one is starting to fall in love with a third party; and one is constantly giving in to the temptation to cheat on her boyfriend in NS. All I have to say is that, in my view, if I were to start a LDR with someone, I will make sure the person is bloody well worth it, and is someone that I want to spend my future with. On a side note, I believe that trust is paramount to a successful LDR, along with making as much time as possible for each other, and keeping conversations and activities interesting. Easier said than done though, a lot easier said than done.
I hereby conclude my post on long distance relationships as requested. Much apologies for the non-existent structure and the poor choice of vocabulary and sentence structure coupled with a lack of ideas and imagination towards the end of the post, as I am typing this whilst falling asleep...
11:38 AM
